Lucas electrics jokes

Just for amusement!
Post Reply
Dixie normous
Posts: 192
Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2019 9:13 pm
Great Britain

Lucas electrics jokes

Post by Dixie normous »

Found this while browsing so I 'borrowed' it

The Lucas motto: "Get home before dark."

* Lucas denies having invented darkness. But they still claim "sudden, unexpected darkness"

* Lucas--inventor of the self-dimming headlamp.

* The three-position Lucas switch--DIM, FLICKER and OFF.

* The other three switch settings--SMOKE, SMOLDER and IGNITE.

* Lucas dip-switch positions: LOW and BLOW

* The original anti-theft devices--Lucas Electric products.

* "I've had a Lucas pacemaker for years and have never experienced any prob...

* If Lucas made guns, wars would not start either.

* Did you hear about the Lucas powered torpedo? It sank.

* It's not true that Lucas, in 1947, tried to get Parliament to
repeal Ohm's Law. They withdrew their efforts when they met too much
resistance.

* Did you hear the one about the guy that peeked into a Land Rover
and asked the owner "How can you tell one switch from another at
night, since they all look the same?" "He replied, it doesn't matter
which one you use, nothing happens!"

* Back in the '70s Lucas decided to diversify its product line and
began manufacturing vacuum cleaners. It was the only product they
offered which didn't suck.

* Quality Assurance phoned and advised the Lucas engineering guy
that they had trouble with his design shorting out. So he made the
wires longer.

* Alexander Graham Bell invented the Telephone.
Thomas Edison invented the Light Bulb.
Joseph Lucas invented the Short Circuit.

* Lucas systems actually uses AC current; it just has a random frequency.

* How to make AIDS disappear? Give it a Lucas parts number.

* Recently, Lucas won out over Bosch to supply the electrical for
the new Volkswagens. So, now the cars from the Black Forest will come
with electrics supplied by the Lord of Darkness -- how appropriate!

* Lucas is an acronym for Loose Unsoldered Connections and Splices


Black smoke dont mean its broke
Tractorman-nz
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue Jul 21, 2020 11:45 pm
New Zealand

Re: Lucas electrics jokes

Post by Tractorman-nz »

Very good
User avatar
Jeroen Sleijpen
Site Admin
Posts: 3535
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2018 7:30 pm
Location: Houthem St.Gerlach, The Netherlands
Contact:
Netherlands

Re: Lucas electrics jokes

Post by Jeroen Sleijpen »

🤣🤣🤣

We always called Lucas, Prince of darkness
Leyland, Nuffield, BMC message board Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/leylandnuffield/

Nuffield 10/60
Nuffield 10/42
Nuffield 342
Nuffield Universal 3
Gadgetman
Posts: 13
Joined: Sun May 08, 2022 10:07 pm
Norway

Re: Lucas electrics jokes

Post by Gadgetman »

User avatar
JohnP
Senior Member
Posts: 347
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2018 8:05 pm
Location: Northamptonshire
Great Britain

Re: Lucas electrics jokes

Post by JohnP »

I have always said that all electrical circuits are powered by smoke!

Have you noticed that whenever the smoke escapes that particular circuit stops working!!!
JVP

If it ain't bust don't fix it!
User avatar
Jeroen Sleijpen
Site Admin
Posts: 3535
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2018 7:30 pm
Location: Houthem St.Gerlach, The Netherlands
Contact:
Netherlands

Re: Lucas electrics jokes

Post by Jeroen Sleijpen »

JohnP wrote: Fri May 20, 2022 8:06 am I have always said that all electrical circuits are powered by smoke!

Have you noticed that whenever the smoke escapes that particular circuit stops working!!!
:lol:
Leyland, Nuffield, BMC message board Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/leylandnuffield/

Nuffield 10/60
Nuffield 10/42
Nuffield 342
Nuffield Universal 3
Post Reply